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Showing posts from 2012
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the "before" pics  the only way to describe the yellow is  that it's the color of vaseline - YUCK! a garage full of cabinets that took weeks to sand down  the makeshift pantry (where the fridge belongs)  raise the roof!  such a difference without the low ceiling and hanging cabinets  just needs to be painted so we can hang the uppers on Friday!  the primed cabinets to be painted tomorrow and Tuesday (hopefully to be finished by Friday for hanging) I cannot wait to post "AFTER" pics of our kitchen. It may be awhile, so I will continue to post pics of the current situation. Right now I am gearing up for a lot of hours spent painting cabinets. I am so lucky my sister is going to help me. This is consuming most of my thoughts right now, though I try to keep perspective so I can be a decent wife/mother. I am really trying to enjoy the process but that is not my natural M.O.

Kitchen Remodel

We are in the middle of redoing our kitchen. I can't find my camera but I will post before and after pics. We are sanding down our "new"(used) cabinets in the garage every chance we get. After they are sanded we prime, paint, glaze and seal them. Then we get to take out the existing cabinets, find flooring to match and add it, then install the new ones. We are going to try to spray paint our 70s-looking beige appliances black to match the fridge and then add the backsplash. We have a lot of work behind and ahead of us, but it is going to be so nice when done. Last week was a nightmare. We had some workers here to raise our 7' ceiling and the kitchen was a mess. They took 2 days longer than anticipated, pushing back cleanup for our pending guests. In the interim we had a makeshift kitchen in our basement, complete with microwave, Scott's college fridge, folding chairs and card table, and our griddle. We did dishes in the bathroom. I was also really sick with a ba...

Messages to Heaven

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These are pics from Elliot Day. We went to the park with our balloons: my red heart, Scott's blue star, Bailey's truck, Myles' Sponge Bob one and Landon's Spiderman one. Each of us wrote a message to Elliot and attached it, let the balloons go, taking our messages to him in heaven. We had a great time at the park together. We talked about how much we missed him and what he might be doing if he were here with us. Then the kids played at the park and Scott and I sat together. It was a wonderful day for our family and I know Elliot was with us, buoying us up, being our angel. Big breath - we made it through the first year, which I do hope will be the hardest.

Elliot Day

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My mom always said the days leading up to the anniversary of my father's death were actually worse than the actual day itself. I have seen that this week as we prepared for today, the one year mark after losing Elliot. Two days ago was the hardest, since it was the date we found out Elliot had died. Today we celebrate Elliot Day, the son/brother who belongs to us, just not on this earth, not at this time. This image was what the nurses put on the hospital door while delivering my stillborn son. Our room was set back from the other delivery rooms. At first I thought they were banishing us in case I wailed or mourned too loudly. Of course I soon realized it was so thoughtful of them, to remove us from the soft cries of the other newborns, of what we would not hear in our room. I will be forever grateful to them for the kindness, compassion and tenderness they showed us through that difficult process. (My doctor is a different story, not for this post.) I have many thoughts fo...
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Bailey's first day of school  Myles' first day (Bailey's 2nd day) 1st graders take a tour on the other grades' first day  We went camping!!! This is the first time our family  went camping together. We stayed in my cousin's camp  trailer. It was so much fun; we want to get one next summer  Family hike (minus B, who was at the lake)  Lola at her last class of puppy training Lola graduated The kids love school. (Myles is bored but I have already talked to his teacher and will just have to work with him at home.) They both have friends and don't complain about going so I am thrilled. Landon started his neighborhood preschool this past week and asks every day if he gets to go to preschool. On Wednesday I started the weekly babysitting of my niece and nephew. Lacee will turn 3 in January; Mason is 5 weeks old. They were so cute and Landon enjoyed playing with Lacee now that she doesn't wear diap...

Break through!

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Sometimes it doesn't take much to have a break through. My kids are in school and I have been so productive. I painted some accents walls in our bathroom. My sister had this a fun mistint from Sherwin Williams (very similar to above). The kids' bathroom upstairs really needs help (old flower wallpaper - YUCK) but I wanted a project that I could do quickly. I wanted instant gratification and this is the way to go. An hour here, an hour there and I am done. I am doing an accent wall in my room today. Bailey is enjoying school. She is able to find a friend from church with whom to eat and do recess. She has a fun teacher and even though she says "school is never-ending and long" I know she is happy. She also started gymnastics last week. She wants to be in the Olympics. I remember badly wanting to be a swimmer in the Olympics. Myles is another story. The novelty of school wore off after two days. He says he is bored and does not like recess because he can't fi...

New changes

Things are changing...again. My kids will be starting at the neighborhood public school on Monday. We attended the charter school open house last week and found out that not much that I had been promised about the school was true. There will be no ability-based groups for Math or Reading until 5th grade. They do not break into smaller groups for learning and they do not have ongoing assessments. At first it felt like another punch to the gut, another reminder of the great school we had to give up in Arizona. On the bright side, I just saved myself an hour and a half in the car, the kids will be able to go to school with their friends and we will be part of this neighborhood community here. We went to this school's open house tonight. Everyone was very friendly. The school is plain but the teachers are excited and the staff is very helpful. We saw the curriculum for Myles and this year will pretty much be a review for him in Math, Reading and Writing. I am sick about this but will...

Fun Few Weeks

I have had the best few weeks lately. My friend, Michelle, was here visiting from Texas. We hit the zoo, the planetarium, the splash pad downtown at the Gateway, Temple Square, City Creek, and a BBQ place right by our house. She showed me places I might not have seen even though I live here. It was so great having her here. I miss being with people who know and love me! I also had another friend here, Chelsea from Mesa. We were able to connect a few times, as well. My kids loved the fun activities and seeing old friends. In June my best friend, Spring, came out for a family function. I don't think I mentioned that, but it was so great to see her. She came at a real low point here and was just the pick-me-up that I needed.  I am grateful that most of my loved ones have some connection to Utah and we can reunite when they are here, though it makes it very difficult when they have to leave! Scott and I "celebrated" our 11th anniversary yesterday sleep deprived, with my ni...

The life I never thought I would have

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We have a mini schnauzer puppy and we live in Utah. Those are two things I honestly never thought I would say. My life is completely different than I ever thought it would be and it's not entirely a bad thing. Scott is home more often now that he works ten minutes away. We are almost done with the short sale on the house in Mesa (Hallelujah!!!!!) and money will not be as tight. We are doing more things as a family, especially now that we have the dog. We are able to see my family more often, especially my siblings, and we love that.  This dog has really been a good thing for us, particularly for me. I have to go to bed at a decent hour because she wakes up at 6 am. I used to get up at 6 am but then I started slacking once we moved here. We have to clean up shoes, toys, books, basically anything we don't want destroyed. We named her Lola and the kids and I are really enjoying her. Scott tolerates her. She is such a sweet little thing and she loves us so much. Our neighbor...

Bailey is 10!

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Bailey is ten years old. I still remember the day she was born. I remember the first time I felt her move in my belly - it felt like a fish swimming across my stomach. She has been such a blessing in my life since day one. Of my three kids, she was and still is the best sleeper. She is strong and independent, but still loves being with me. I hope that lasts; I hope we can make it through the next ten treacherous years. Bailey is social, smart and sometimes sassy. She is so much like me; that is where we clash. I want so much more for her, hope for her to not have my weaknesses, but then I take a step back. I want her to have the freedom to be who she is without apology. I'm sure my parents did their best at being parents, but I never want my kids to feel that who they are is not good enough. Aren't we all trying to be better than our parents were and hoping our kids will turn out even better than we did? I have never met anyone more determined than Bailey. When she w...

Father's Day - yesterday

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I am so glad my kids have a wonderful father. I am a very lucky woman to have Scott in my life! Scott and I were asked to speak in church on Father's Day. For those not of the LDS faith, they let normal church members speak at the pulpit during our Sunday meetings, especially when you are new, so you can introduce your family to the congregation. I don't normally have a problem speaking in public, but Father's Day is difficult for me. My father passed away 13 years ago, very unexpectedly, while I was in Venezuela as a missionary. Of course I think about my father every day, but Father's Day is a hard day. Scott's father passed away almost 4 years ago from cancer; the day is difficult for him, too. I miss both of our fathers and miss the grandfathers they would be to our kids. Needless to say, I cried off and on during my talk, but I was able to testify of C hrist, His love that heals and the power of the Atonement. I know our families can be to...
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We had so much fun with Myles' pirate-themed birthday party. I don't have my computer set up so I made one invitation, then photocopied the others. My kids were enthralled as I burned the edges to make it look old like a treasure map. I also had a blast making the treasure chest cake. The party consisted of several games. First up, the kids had to walk to plank. Next, the kids dueled on the plank with swords (breadsticks). Whoever was left standing with sword in tact won. Next up was hooking pretzels. I fashioned a hook out of the top of a hanger inside a plastic cup. As soon as I get my computer up with the pics from my camera I can show what I am talking about. The boys took turns hooking pretzels to see who could grasp the most. Next we had a pirate piñata. Then we had cake and opened presents. Before the parents came we had a scavenger hunt to find their goody bags. It was a fun party and I was glad when it was over. I asked Myles what his favorite part of the pa...

Happy Birthday, Myles!

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Today Myles turned 6. I apologize for the pictures but they are from iphoto because my computer is not yet hooked up and I am stuck using a mac laptop (which I am  grateful to have) but miss the better quality of my camera.  Anyway, Myles Jay Barber is a true miracle and gift from God. All children are miracles and gifts from God and I do not mean to downplay anyone else's miracles, but Myles really came to us at a time when I thought we might never be able to have any more children. The fact that Bailey came without a hitch just proves that when she wants something badly enough, she will make it happen! After Bailey we suffered two miscarriages; both were hard on me emotionally and physically. I had a good friend who was a labor and delivery nurse who suggested I take a baby aspirin every day of the first trimester of my next pregnancy. Miraculously, this worked and Myles joined our family. *** Myles had a rough first year due to acid reflux (though he was en...

Sandy, Ut

We have been in Utah for 11 days. In the past we have spent longer than this visiting Utah so in a way I am still just a visitor here. However, the house we bought needs a lot of work (more than we realized) and so I certainly won't call this a vacation. Before I rant about the negatives, let me stress that people have been very friendly to us here. We love our little cul-de-sac and the neighborhood. People at church have introduced themselves and as soon as school gets out here I know we will have playdates with our new friends. The first week here we were able to spend a lot of time with my mom and her husband, Bert. We also saw my siblings a few times. That really helped ease our loneliness and perpetuated my feelings of being here for a visit. We love being closer to family. I have enjoyed the downtime. Had this been the first week of summer in Arizona we would have been running from activity to activity, with my kids constantly needing friends over and swim time. Here my c...

Bring it on - I think

We are moving to Utah in three days. My house is a wreck; I feel like we are living the way hoarders live,  minus the rats, cats and various smells. The point is, we have been in packing mode for the last month and it has almost pushed me to the point of being ready to move. I cannot stand the disarray around here; it is mentally exhausting. We have taken three vanloads of STUFF to Savers and that feels good. We will be ready but we do have a lot of work ahead of us: finishing packing the next two days, loading the truck, then making the actual trip, then the unloading and don't get me started on the UNpacking. And then we have walls and ceilings to paint. And carpet to replace. And... okay, cannot think about it. Must take it one day at a time. I am so thankful to have had the past four months to digest this move and all it entails. No, I have not accepted this move 100% and yes, I have cried countless times (counting now as I type this). I have really lived these past four mon...

The end of preschool

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I found this unfinished post from April 26th and decided to publish it unfinished. I have to write down all the emotions I am feeling. I cannot believe that preschool is over. For the last 9 months that has been a major part of my life. I feel happy and sad. I feel proud of myself. I started a business and it was successful! The kids and I enjoyed it right up until the end. For the first time I am not questioning what more I could have done. I have no regrets and that feels great! I am also feeling sad because now it is really time to pack up the house and move. We move four weeks from tomorrow. This was the last big event and now it is over.
I have a lot to update. First and foremost, the plan to move to Utah is falling into place. I say that tongue-in-cheek, since none of this has been easy, but let's just say that the Lord always knows what He is doing and I have found that when I follow His path, despite the all-too-often accompanying stress, heartbreak and pain, things do work out. We went to Utah during Spring Break and bought a house. Scott had several interviews and was offered a job after we returned home. The whole process has been done in reverse; generally people get a job offer, decide to move and then get a house. None of this has been conventional. We don't LOVE the house, but we know it is where we are supposed to be. Coincidentally, the new job for Scott is only ten minutes from where we will live. I am doing cartwheels (emotionally) at the thought of having my husband around again. What will that even be like? I cannot wait to find out! The housing market in Utah is crazy right now. Prices are much...
February is my all-time favorite month, not only because of my birthday at the end, but I love red and pink, Valentine's Day, hearts, chocolate, being in love and enjoying the perfect Arizona weather all month long . I am not a mushy person but I am a lucky girl with a wonderful husband. I am so blessed and love being married. I love being a mother, too, but it is not as blissful, obviously. The Lord has decided to turn our lives upside down. About a month ago I received an impression that we needed to return to Utah. That has been heart-breaking. I cried the first 12 days straight over it. I love my life here. I thought I had it all planned out; we never wanted to move and are still trying to understand. Honestly, I am in denial. I still cry whenever I have moments of lucidity. Two weeks ago Scott felt a prompting to return to school; he moved quickly to get his application and transcripts in to BYU by the short deadline of February 1st. Now we are waiting to see if he gets acce...

The Polar Express

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Early in December we went to Williams and rode the Polar Express with Grandma Peggy and Grandpa Bill. The whole day was an adventure: we realized too late that the DVD player didn't work. As we got closer to Flagstaff and temps dropped, we realized our heater was broken; at a gas station someone told us that the freeway we were taking was closed ahead because of snow. We had to backtrack and take back roads. At a small town I googled a mechanic and he fixed our heater. It was 12 degrees and I was freezing! Originally our plan was to find a place to go sledding before the train ride, but a 3 1/2 hour trip turned into an 8 hour trip. Luckily we made it to the train station with a half hour to spare. The experience was worth the trouble. On the way to the North Pole we listened to the story of the Polar Express. We loved the hot chocolate and ginormous cookies. We got to see Santa and his elf out the window at the North Pole. Santa then came aboard and gave all the kids a little bell....